Sunday, December 10, 2006


I am sorry it took so long to get this post up (internet broke again thanks to my Dad, it's his latest talent). It has been in drafts for more than 2 weeks and has been in the planning stages since a cold winter morning in 2003 as I was driving to school in the city and heard the official announcement that Pettitte was signing with Houston. He had just won 20 games for the Yankees and got them into the World Series. He had done everything they could have asked for and more in 9 years. He was a true Yankee, a product of their farm system, and they did not want him back. I sat there in desbelief waiting for my Dad to pintch me, wake me up, and tell me I was having a bad dream. I still remember the song 1050 ESPN Radio played and how sad it made me. I know baseball is just a game, but Pettitte symbolized a lot to me. This day has been long time in coming, but it is finally here.

After a long and tiring week at work I was sitting down at the table Friday night before the meal, when my brother pipes up. "I have some news for you," he said (or something like that). Then came the dramatic pause. I had some idea of what the news might be, but I wasn't sure if I would like it. The papers had been discussing a possible Pettitte return. After deciding against retirement, free agent pitcher Andy Pettitte was only considering two teams, his hometown Houston Astros and the New York Yankees where he became a big time pitcher and fan favorite for 9 years. In 2003, when the Yankees ignored him he went home so that he could be closer to his family and supposedly he was still leaning toward returning to the Astros. The Yankees gave him a deadline of late December. I didn't think he would reach a decision that quickly so I didn't know what to expect. Would it be exhiliration or more disappointment?

Fortunately, it was the former. My brother told me that late Friday afternoon it was announced that Pettitte had made the decision to sign with the Yanks. I was speechless aside from a few shrieks as I jumped for joy. That whole weekend I had a silly smile on my face. I guess you can say it was for guy I had sorely missed. I truly think he can help bring back the Yankees' glory days. He will definitely anchor this aging pitching staff. The Yankees have spent more than three years and wasted millions of dollars (I would better over 100 million) trying to replace their star left hander. Steinbrenner spent an insane amount of money on the ancient Kevin Brown, Javier Vasquez of Toronto, the still injured Carl Pavano, and Jaret Wright, just to name a few. All were big time busts. Although I do not think it was Cashman who was adamant not to sign him, it is about time they came to their senses and corrected their mistake. Hey, better late than never, but they wasted some great years.

Pitching was one of the keys, if not the key reson, the Yankees have not won a championship in the last few years. Pettitte was one of the main anchors of, arguably, the best starting staff in the major leagues. He was great in the regular season, and even better in the post season. When the team was down in a big playoff series you knew Pettitte would pick the team back up. If I remember correctly, he was the MVP in the 2000 or 2001 ALCS. He was also my favorite pitcher, still is. He pitched the first baseball game I ever saw, which will always have a special place in my heart. Furthermore, he is real. Pettitte is an all-around great guy, family man, and role model to all kids.

I hope I will be at the first game he is back to pitch. If not I will definitely be watching. This year I will have something special to watch and cheer for, besides a championship. Now I can take my Pettitte jersey (that I bought on sale when he left) out of my closet, dust it off, and put it on for the first time. (Who knows, maybe Clemens will make his way back to NY too. His defection left a bitter taste in the mouths of most fans and a majority do not want him back. But, I would go for it. Let the fun and games begin.)

Number 46 is back, and I cannot wait for the season to start.

Sunday, December 03, 2006


in memories
Caught up
in the past
in dreams
in hopes
in regrets
in memories

thought i was over it
thought it was in the past
thought i'd moved on
but then
a snapshot of a face
from the past
brought the memories
flooding back
to haunt me

i can't go back there
i can't do anything more
to change the ending
so stop
stop taunting me
i can't deal with those memories
i can't remember that past
i have to move on
it's over
that dream is dead

when i moved on
i only put
off the inevitable
was only boxed up
waiting for a chance
to escape
at the slightest provocation
any reminder
forcing me to
deal with the pain
all over again

time can dull the pain
but just seeing
a photograph
a snapshot
or catching a glimpse
can bring everything
rushing back

so unexpected
a flash
an image
but then it clicked
just something about your smile
that twists my heart

so unclear
so confused
don’t know what to do
can’t forget
memories chase me
can't run
can't hide
no escape

getting stuck in the past
so caught up in what i had
happy memories
now cause pain
painful to remember
all that was within reach
if i'll ever
find that again
so sure
ready to take the leap
on a moments notice
trust so completely
so suddenly
all encompassing

why can’t someone knock
some sense into…
i’m lost

lost in my own world
with no one
who can understand
so alone

no one
to walk beside me
support me

With you
Felt so safe

i can't go back there
i can't do anything more
to change the ending
so stop
stop taunting me
i can't deal with those memories
i can't remember that past
i have to move on
it's over
that dream is dead
leave me alone
go away
don’t bother me again
don’t make me shatter you to pieces
you can’t take action
so give up
I’m ready to fight
for my future
right now
you are not part of it
so take a hike